Easier Way to Cardiovascular Health?

breastThe New England Journal of Medicine is a respected publication, so I have taken this study’s recommendations very seriously. Heart disease runs in my family – I am the only living Cowan that has not had a heart attack, open heart surgery, or a significant heart procedure. I (usually) exercise regularly and have reduced my sodium consumption. For health reasons, I now look at women’s breasts.

The summary of the study suggests that photographs were used – I doubt Demi and Dolly donated 5 years in support of this important research. It also is not clear if the breasts being oogled were covered or bare. I would hope that follow-up studies would be conducted to help isolate the benefits. For example, is five minutes of live bare breast staring equivalent to 10 minutes a day perusing a Victoria’s Secret catalog? Also, what about online breasts, which are readily available? These are serious questions that should be answered.

Regardless of your support structure and delivery method, I have found that getting your daily 10 minutes of breast oogling is more difficult than you might think – similar to getting to the gym for 45 minutes every day. Such things are generally frowned upon in a work environment.

It is important to note that Linda does her part in helping me lead a long, healthy life. My wife is exceptional in many ways.
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Of related interest, Playboy Magazine has an entertaining annual feature – the Breast Test. Best not to click that link if you are unsure of your company’s computer usage policy.

In my experience , I believe that women in particular are overconfident in their perceived ability to identify artificially enhanced breasts, despite most statistical evidence to the contrary. Assuming that the same health benefits can be derived from both fake and real breasts, you can test your skills and improve your health at the same time.

Thank you, Playboy.

Hurricane Survival Priorities

I got this photo from a friend. What do you think they left behind Management wrote off generic viagra australia another person on the planet. As the blog owner you need to be aware of what erectile dysfunction is all about, it is a condition that some men suffer from, which makes it difficult to put an estimate on this problem afflicting ‘mankind’. cheapest price for tadalafil shop cialis Key ingredients in Musli Strong capsule include Musli Sya, Semal Musli and Safed Musli. viagra pharmacy find description This medicine is widely used all over the globe for getting cured from erectile dysfunction. in order to bring the Keystone Ice tall boy?

priorities

The Sex Chair

For Christmas 2004, Linda bought me a sex chair. When your wife buys you a bamboo chair originally used in a 1930s Shanghai brothel, that is a signal that life is good.

sex
The chair is much more comfortable than you might think, given that it is made of wood. The headrest puts the neck in a very comfortable position and the curvature of the chair is pretty much perfect. It is really made for short people – your average Asian. At 6 feet tall I am pushing the limits of the design.

Most of our friends have given it a go from a comfort perspective. It was popular with my parents and aunt – during a spring visit it was typically occupied at the conclusion of days spent walking extensively. Ironically, I think more people whack the big red drum than test the bamboo sex chair. Natural selection in the modern age?

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Linda told me I was not allowed to ask a Chinese woman to show me how it works. If given a demonstration, I think even my rudimentary Chinese would be capable of comprehension.

Alas, best not to rock the boat.

Dean and Linda’s Friend Project

Linda and I appreciate our friends so I think we are going to add a blog section about you. Essentially we would write about and share pictures of our friends. Maybe nice stories and pictures to share with family. Maybe embarrassing stories and pictures to generate traffic to our blog.

Let’s see how it plays out.

There is certainly risk involved in such an endeavor.

Visitors to our blog that are not identified as friends may elect not to return to our site and terminate any remaining friendship.

Visitors to our blog that are identified as friends may ask us to remove this reference and terminate any remaining friendship.

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Let’s see how it plays out.

Disclaimers: Past performance is no guarantee of future results. Note that there is no priority order for friend postings (neither top down nor bottom up). Timing of information disclosure is purely by whim. Memories of the authors are always deemed more accurate than memories of the subjects. Duplicates are allowed. If distressed by the musings, friends may comment but should remember that we have full administrative rights to the blog and can zap anything contrary to the common good.

Please be patient as we begin The Friend Project.

Click here to read about Dave and Kristi.

Technical Comment

I have been playing around unsuccessfully with some advanced picture posting approaches. No one wants to read what I write, you just want more pictures.

Linda is sending me a book on HTML, XML (Extensible Markup Language) and CSS (Cascading Style Sheets). These are the basic web technologies WordPress (this blog) is based on. To play with pictures, I need to understand more about CSS and refresh my html skills.
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I am playing with Picasa – a Google product recommended by a friend. Our page with the additional photos was created using this free tool. That ‘picture page’ is not ‘integrated’ with my blog but there are some products available that may help me better achieve what I would like to do. The simple links in the Scotland post are probably adequate but I’d like to be able to allow visitors to sort through pictures just like they sort through posts and pages.

Scotland

dean_kiltLinda and I travel a lot. It is one of the things we enjoying doing together. I have been in Asia for about 18 months, so it is kind of funny my first travel post is about our September 2005 trip to Scotland.

I have had many requests for kilt pictures.

At the time of the trip, I had just moved to Beijing from Shanghai and Linda was living in Chicago. We had not seen each other for about 6 weeks and rendezvoused in Edinburgh. The purpose of the trip was to attend the wedding of two of our friends from Shanghai – Angie and Chris. Angie has become one of Linda’s important friends, even though, being Scottish, she talks funny. Chris an Australian but has lived in many different places. He is currently working from Shanghai. He talks funny, too, but not as funny as Angie.

We spent about 10 days in Scotland. In addition to attending the wedding, we traveled around a large portion of the Scottish west coast and midsection with another pair of friends from Shanghai – Jim and Kellee. They are American and work for the US government in Shanghai.

Click here for a couple more pictures of the trip.

Itinerary: Short Version

We started in Edinburgh. Very cosmopolitan city with the energy of a college town. We would return to Edinburgh – very nice. Edinburgh hosts a number of art and music festivals the month of August – we arrived at the tail end of the celebrations. Each time I visit, one thing that strikes me about the United Kingdom (and most of Europe) is how much older the cities are than in the United States. There are buildings older than the modern United States – we just don’t have stuff that old in the US.

dean_lindaAfter attending the wedding in a small town whose name I can’t spell or pronounce, we drove west and took a ferry to Islay – an island on the southwest coast of Scotland. Islay is known for sheep and Scotch whiskey. Linda’s favorite scotch comes from this island and most of the 5-6 distilleries on Islay have the distinct smoky, earthy flavor that the island’s industry is known for. We tasted several variations. Very relaxing.

We then headed north generally along the coast and spent a day on the ‘Harry Potter’ train. Our friends were skeptical. Each day, Scot Rail sends a refurbished steam train along a section of track surrounded by glens (translated as big hills, as close as I can tell) and lochs (basically a lake, but I am sure there is more to it). The train stops for a few hours in a small seaside town at the end of the line and then returns on the same route. You pass several of the areas from the movies – including the bridge from the flying car scene.

We continued to Loch Ness but did not notice anything unusual. This area was very forested, so Nessie could be hidding in either the woods or the water. Another night was spent in an old castle that has been turned into a bed and breakfest – on the North Sea on the east coast. Linda and Kellee chowed down on ‘smokies’ – haddock that are smoked, giving off a distinctive smell. I did not try them, but smokies are very popular in that area and among my traveling companions.

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Our last night was spent in Glasgow though we didn’t have much time to look around. Met some friendly blokes at a local bar and chatted for several hours.

If we return to Scotland, we would stay at least 10 days and pick a smaller area to visit. Scotland seems to be a great place to walk and hike but we did not have the opportunity to do much of this.

friends_stirling

Driving on the Left

Not as hard as I expected. Everyone said it was not difficult and after a day or two it felt normal. When driving, I thought the most challenging part was downshifting around corners – steering with your right hand and shifing with your left – everything backwards.

Jim and I both agreed that it was more comfortable to drive than ride in the front passenger seat. Being a passenger on the far opposite side of the road from what you are used to was often disconcerting. There was the constant feeling that you would go careening off the road into a tree. My 3-5 noticeable drifts left into curb kept Jim awake and buckled up.

How to Wear a Kilt

jim_flashesJim and I rented kilts – just like you rent a tuxedo in the US. You even wear a tux shirt and bow tie with a vest and jacket. The big question was what to wear under the kilt. Jim and I wore nothing, which is what all the Scottish told us was the Scottish way. Despite wearing a skirt with no underwear, a kilt is surprisingly hot – something like 7-8 yards of wool. Linda kept flirting with me.

Jim demonstrated one risk of inexperienced kilt wearing. This picture did not turn out as well as I would have liked so I had to make some contrast and color edits to highlight what was obvious to us but oblivious to Jim. I must have been laughing so hard I made the camera shake. Sorry, Jim.

jim_flashes

Judicial Experience Not Required

miersName: Harriet Miers

Background: woman; George Bush’s personal attorney

Judicial Experience: none, but must have talked to several judges while leading White House search for appropriate nominee
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Noted Strengths:
born-again Christian so early sins wiped away; part of life is religion

Editor’s Recommendation: vote no; in a country of lawyers, surely we can find someone who actually has relevent experience

Economist #1

economistFor those of you that know me, the fact that my first reference to the Economist magazine comes 60+ days following my first post is surprising. My MBA is from the University of Chicago. I am from the ‘Chicago School.’ Demand curves shift left. Supply curves shift right. The answer to any question is always at the intersection. At the intersection, the world is good. If not, your analysis is flawed or the government mucked it up.

As reported in the Economist, a journal article solves one of life’s greatest mystery’s: when snapped, why does a strand of dry pasta [spaghetti] rarely break in half but fragment into three or more pieces?

The question – ‘why does it not break in half’ was first issued by a Nobel prize winner and quantum theory physicist. He apparently died with no more than a ‘kitchen full of pulverized pasta.’

The answer to the question is flexural waves – ironically suggested by Parisians and not Italians or Chicago MBA’s.

‘Each time part of a bent strand [of pasta] breaks, a series of [flexural waves] ripples down the length of the pasta. The mistake [the nobel prize winner] made was to assume that the strain released when a bent strand breaks allows the two half-strands to relax and becme straight again.’

How stupid.
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According to the wine drinking French, ‘the passing waves cause parts of the daughter strands to curve even further and trigger other breakages, which in turn’ trigger further waves, breakages and fragments. They even provide the math to prove it.

To see the flexural waves in action, go to www.lmm.jussieu.fr/spaghetti – Barilla no. 1 dry pasta (of length 24.1cm) rippling flexural waves at 1000 frames per second sans sauce.

NOTE: To view pasta destruction requires Apple’s Quicktime

French tax dollars at work for the betterment of global society. Just like the Airbus subsidies?

New Orleans

bush vacation

I appologize for any copyright infringement, but I found this photo sadly amusing. I have decided Mr. Bush is an idiot and believe the United States is less safe to today as a result of his foreign policy and foreign policy failures. After realizing compassionate conservatism was a farce and the size of federal government spending was at historical highs, I voted for a democratic presidential candidate for the first time ever in 2004.

So they continued their cialis prescriptions research for some more years and finally came up with a medicine for solving this purpose of erectile dysfunction. Right Dosage Is the Secret buying generic cialis Kamagra has been in news for the time of existence. What is going on? Is Lori buy levitra viagra ok?”Dave,” what? Yeah, she is good” John,” well?” Dave,” what?” John,” what’s the issue you doofus? Dave,” hmmm” So what was Dave’s problem? That he was wiped out in the nation’s largest city, New York City. All you have to do is just use the coupon code and get the pills in low cost as compared generic levitra 10mg to the local pharmacy. I was in the UK following the hurricane and during the flooding. The international press made us look completely disfunctional and rightly questioned how, after spending billions of dollars to protect American citizens, a hurricane we knew was coming for > 6 days caused such suffering. The BBC was also interested to know why everyone wading through the water was black.

This is a bit dated but still funny, too.

Beijing’s Turkey Surprise

China is full of surprises. Most of them are painful and come at inconvenient times. But today is bliss. I have secured a bottle of Wild Turkey 101 American bourbon whiskey, which I believe to be genuine. I have lived in China for 15 months and, despite exhaustive searches, today is the first day I have ever seen a bottle of Wild Turkey 101 for sale in mainland China. I had a drink (two, actually) to celebrate.

turkeyFor those of you that know me, you understand my euphoria. I love American bourbon. I like beer. There is a certain relaxing quality in a smoky scotch or a good tequila (bad scotch and bad tequila are the reverse of relaxing). Top quality gin is passable in a pinch. But I love bourbon. I am probably a bourbon snob – I haven’t been able to drink Jim Beam for > 10 years, Jack Daniels only in a pinch and usually on a plane. My choices: Wild Turkey 101 (80 proof is crap – not drinkable), Bookers, and Pappy Van Winkle Family reserve at Christmas (worship the wife). I make room for Old Grand Dad at Caribbean bars with no Wild Turkey, and Ancient (Ancient) Age in Ohio with my Grandmother-In-Law – I love all women who drink bourbon, regardless of age.

The Duty Free areas in Seoul and Hong Kong both sell the turkey spirit. This weekend I discovered that Edinburgh and Frankfurt airports do not sell Wild Turkey 101. Civilized cities? I think not.

My Chinese friends – or more precisely my friends that live in China – will attest to my two greatest complaints about Communist China – no American bourbon and no American football. China will not be a threat to American economic dominance until I can sit at home and watch the Chicago Bears live on television while drinking good American bourbon – albeit at 1 AM on a Monday morning.

The bourbon, surprisingly, was found at this small shop across the street from my apartment. The street is an 8 lane highway, so it is a 15 minute walk across the pedestrian overpass. My eyes trained for Wild Turkey 101, I caught a glimpse of a familiar bottle from the street out of the corner of my eye, 25 feet away. The shop was very Chinese – mostly cigarettes with 4 men smoking in front. The prize was on an upper shelf – I had to stand on my tip-toes to grab it, so I am certain none of the staff could reach the bottle and suggestive that no Chinese buy Wild Turkey from this shop. I looked twice, grabbed a bottle securely and looked again. Bingo!

There were actually two (visible) bottles in the store. I considered nabbing both and the more I consider it the more I think that would have been the appropriate course of action. The price was fair – US$20 for a US fifth (700 ml for the metrically inclined). That equates to 160 RMB – including the Coke I paid yi bei lio shi san kuai. I had to ask three times to understand 163 – her lio didn’t sound like lio, so a co-worker had to state it more explicitly.

Durchi cz SAAD dressing

I am exploring my new neighborhood in China and ventured to Jenny Lou’s. This is a small chain of small grocery stores that cater to Westerners – lots of foreign food – canned goods, bottled goods, boxed goods, frozen goods. I found a renewable source of Cheez-Its and another China first – Strawberry Pop Tarts with icing (only the non-icing version was available in Shanghai – what’s the point, really). A branch of a popular Italian / Pizza chain is next door – who knew? Jenny’s failed me in the bourbon quest though I looked through the liquor department just in case. I raided the nearby cigarette shop following this episode.

Within 30 seconds of entering Jenny Lou’s for the first time, I was accosted by a staff member brandishing a torn piece of paper.

She said to me ‘blablablablablabla.’ I said to her: ‘Shenme’ (what)? She shoved the paper in my face and said ‘blablablablablabla.’ I said to her: ‘Shenme’ (what)? She grabed my hand and dragged me to aisle 5 and confronted me with 2 other Chinese women who immediately asked me ‘blablablablablabla?’ I said to them: ‘Shenme’ (what)?

As the only westerner in the store at the moment, I was the chosen one.

At that point the conversation broke down to grunts and pointing. Apparently they needed help finding ‘saad dressing’ of the type ‘durchi cz’. I initially interpreted as salad dressing of the brand durchi cz – there are many European brands in China, so it seemed plausible.

Alas, I could not find durchi cz saad dressing.

Not to be deterred, one of the women pulled out her mobile phone, started dialing, and said to me ‘blablablablablabla.’ I interpreted as ‘you can’t speak Chinese so I am calling my boss.’

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Once connected, I was passed the phone. I was speaking to another Chinese woman, but this time in English. Her boss had asked her to secure Blue Cheese Salad Dressing. Durchi cz is a type of cheese, not a brand.

That was understandable, so I hung up.

Bad decision.

There was no blue cheese salad dressing but I could not remember the Chinese words for blue, for cheese, or for salad, and I am confident I never knew the word for dressing. After a heated exchange of ‘mei you …..’ ‘blablablablablabla’ ‘wo bu zhe dao’ ‘blablablablablabla.’

I walked from the dressing aisle to the cheese aisle in hope of a break through. There seemed to be immediate progress – there were 3 types of blue cheese, immediately identified by the three Chinese women.

Loud discussion ensued.

My skepticism kicked in when the ayi attempted to purchase what appeared to be a lifetime supply of Danish blue cheese. Unable to communicate that this was only one ingredient of the requested durchi cz saad dressing, I broke into grunts and in Chinese shouted ‘1st this and 2nd this.’

Silence. Followed by more shouting and a rush back to the saad dressing aisle.

At that point I was searching for an exit strategy. Optimistic there was at least minimal comprehension, I picked up what I hope was a creamy vegetable dressing and suggested assertively in Chinese ‘this and that’ while pointing to the enormous hunk of cheese. I then said excuse me and rushed for the Pop Tarts.

The women thanked me profusely.

I hope the man eating yogurt and vegetable saad dressing with crumbled durchi cz tonight has a sense of humor.